


Wherever You May Go

by cherrypinup



Category: Lord of the Rings RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-15
Updated: 2015-01-15
Packaged: 2018-03-07 16:59:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,429
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3177410
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cherrypinup/pseuds/cherrypinup
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sean and Elijah need to learn to communicate.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Sean

**Author's Note:**

> Originally written on 3/7/02 but cleaned up a bit to post here.

I can't say that I didn't see this coming. I did. I should have discouraged it from the beginning but I'm just a man. I have weaknesses.

When we first came here, Lij and I were the only ones that had met. Admittedly it was only a short time before, at the fitting of our wigs, but there was an instant connection. Like we knew each other, beyond what we'd seen on the TV and movie screens.

I imagine that our relationship was encouraged by the fact that we knew we'd be working more closely with each other than anyone else for nearly two years. We instantly bonded in a way that seemed too easy and yet more natural than any relationship I'd ever been a part of. A part of me sat back amazed. I ignored the warning shouted from my heart that I should have been all too aware of.

We've been hanging out off hours in the months since we arrived. Christine won't be here for another few weeks and I've missed her but not as much as I should have or would have had I not been with Elijah. I feel like I've grown an extension and he's coming to mean more to me than I can afford. When she gets here, this will all have to end. It has to. I think.

We're lying on his couch with my legs to either side of him and his body cradled by mine; it's become our customary TV watching position. He fell asleep some time ago, long before the movie ended, and I shut off the television, leaving the room bathed only in the light from the moon. I love to just watch him.

His head is turned in, towards the window behind the couch, resting on my chest. He's got a contented smile on his face and occasionally he breathes a deep sigh. My heart beats slow but hard enough to echo through the hand he has rested over it. I trace a finger down his cheek and run it lightly over his bottom lip. He sighs again before he licks the same lip and, incidentally, my finger. My own breath catches.

We've never talked out loud about how close we are, though we've shared a smile or two over the strange looks given to us by friends and strangers. No one actually asks about us and, since nothing is defined, we choose not to tell. I love him and I know he loves me. That's something that's been spoken out loud, but we've never put it in a box or tried to outline what kind of love. I don't know that there is a definition for it.

Right now I feel that I love him so much it hurts. I know it's not something that should go any farther than it has. My marriage has gone through a few rough spots in the past few years and I don't think it could handle something like this right now. The best thing I can hope to do, for him if not for me, is start spending less time alone with him. As much as the thought tears me up inside, I will try to redirect some of his feelings for me onto someone else. I have to.

I kiss the top of his head and hug him with my whole body. He lifts his head and gives me a sleepy smile before snuggling back down and wrapping his arms around me. 

~*~*~*

It's been almost two weeks since I made the decision to put some distance between us. It seems to be working but I feel a deep ache at the occasional hurt that passes over his face. I'm not the only one that's worried about him, either. Dom has started throwing me dirty looks in the past few days and Billy cornered me before we left the set tonight to ask if we were okay and coerce me to join them.

We've been at the bar for an hour and Lij has had three drinks already. That's more than he usually has in an entire night. Dom's got him in a corner, keeping him entertained and laughing, and he keeps throwing those looks over Lij's shoulder. He's a good friend and would probably be the best one to help take Lij's mind off of our relationship, help him move on. I can feel a scowl form on my face and before I can control it, I see Dom's eyes widen and feel Billy's hand clamp down on my shoulder. Fuck!

I shrug off the hand and storm off to the bathroom. This was a bad idea. I should have stayed home tonight. I should let him spread his wings alone. I'm staring at myself in the mirror over the sink, trying to convince my reflection that this is the right thing to do when I see the door behind me open to admit Billy.

"Are you ready to talk now?" he asks while placing his hand on my shoulder again.

I shake my hanging head and stare down into the dripping sink. He would probably understand what I'm doing, and why, more than any of the others; he's very empathetic. It just feels too close, too personal, to share. This pain is something I need to keep and savor. It's going to be the only thing left of us when it's over.

He lets out a sigh behind me and I can hear the urge to smack me upside the head in it. The thought almost makes me chuckle. His hand slides down from my shoulder and he rubs small circles on my back. I shrug him off. I don't want to feel anything but my heart being ripped out by my own hands.

"I'm going to head out." I say, looking up to meet his reflection. "Please..." I have to stop for a second, at the compassion written on his face. "Can you make sure he gets..." I don't want to say home, if that's not where he intends to go. I just don't think I can acknowledge that it may be somewhere else either.

"I'll make sure he doesn't drive," he says. His eyes are sizing me up in the mirror and I'm afraid he sees much more than I'd like.

"Thanks." My voice cracks. I suck in a deep breath and hold it, feeling my face go red before letting it out. His arms come around me from the back and he squeezes me tightly. He starts to speak a few times but nothing comes out. We stand that way for a few more moments before I shrug him off again attempting to compose myself. When I turn around he doesn't step back so we're toe to toe.

"Are you sure this is what you want?" he asks. I choose not to answer, which is an answer in itself. He stares at me for a moment more before shaking his head and mumbling something I'm glad I can't quite hear.

We go back to the table and I grab my jacket and keys. I say goodbye to Dom and Lij, earning myself a cold response from one and a bewildered look from the other. I can't help but touch him on the shoulder one last time before taking my leave. 

~*~*~*

My family has been here for two months and things are well. I've explained the sleepless nights to Christine as 'work stress', though I'm sure she sees right through that, and the tension that just won't dissipate at work as 'family issues'. So far there have been a few curious questions but only Billy and my wife have given me measuring looks. Both of them are way too perceptive for me to spend much time around.

Things are moving along well with Elijah and Dom. As much as it pains me to notice, they do enjoy each other's company. Lij gave me hurt looks for a few days but seemed to bounce back and right in to things with Dom who still occasionally throws me dirty glances.

I use the excuse of family to beg off outings and have managed to keep myself out of whatever 'loop' there may be regarding their relationship. Tonight will be the first time the four of us are out together since that night. Billy wouldn't take no for an answer. Got to love him. If I didn't, I'd be hiding the body.

I shut off the engine and tell myself to stop procrastinating. Getting out of the car, I debate the cell phone before throwing it back on to the front seat and locking the door. If I bring it in with me, I'll be too tempted to use it and things have got to get back on track before Billy loses his patience and does something drastic.

When I approach the booth Billy gets up and lets me on the inside, which I think is odd. He sits back down beside me and I'm suddenly feeling trapped. Lij is across from me looking nervous as hell with a smirking Dom next to him. The bar feels just a little too quiet.

"Hey, guys. What's going on?" I try for casual but shoot Billy a quick glance out of the corner of my eye. I start measuring my chances of bolting over the top of the booth without hurting anyone.

"Not much." Dom leans back, stretching his arm across the back of the booth seat and Lij's shoulders. Lij tenses for a moment before smiling up at Dom and leaning back into the embrace.

There's already a pitcher of beer and four glasses on the table. I notice that Lij's is full of something clear, hopefully water, and mine is the only one that's full. Ah well, I may as well relax and let whatever happens just happen.

Surprisingly, I have a good time. We're all chatting and laughing and no one's acting as if anything is strange, as if we're all sitting in the wrong seats. Dom is the one with the right to my old seat next to Lij, not me. Not anymore.

Lij is looking beautiful (and I did not just think that). He's flushed with laughter but from what I can see, he's not had any alcohol tonight. I've been tempted a few times to sniff his drink just to make sure. He looks good. Dom has kept a proprietary arm across his shoulders the whole night but aside from that there's been no tension.

I'm happy for him, for them. As much as I wish it felt that my heart had been ripped out, because it would be less painful, I want him to be loved. I know that Dom could never feel for him the intensity of what I do. If he can let go and allow himself this with someone his own age, someone who isn't already tangled up in too many commitments, I'll smile and never let him know how much watching him with someone else hurts me.

God, can I get any sappier? I cover my little slip with a slightly -too- loud laugh and they all look at me strangely for a moment before going back to the conversation. 

~*~*~*

I've stopped turning down invitations to go out. It's not getting any easier on me but Lij seems to want me there and if I can make this transition easier on him then it'll get better. Eventually. I know it will. It has to.

Christine doesn't ask any more questions either. I have a feeling that she and Billy have had more than a few conversations. They get along wonderfully and I always feel like I'm intruding if I walk in on them huddled together. I'm really afraid to know.

Yeah, so I'm a coward. We've got three more months of filming and sometimes I feel like I'm going to break before it's over.

Tonight the party is at Elijah's house. It's more of a wind-down than a party, really. We're all kicking back, having a few drinks, and relaxing with our each other. I've been here a few times in the last year but it hasn't been to relax. I just realized that I haven't sat on this couch since waking up to Lij wrapped around me and an ache in my neck.

He and Dom are sitting where we woke up that morning. They're very close together and giggling nearly into each other's mouths. I'm feeling decidedly sick to my stomach and I haven't even had an entire beer. Oh, joy! Let's add greasy take-out on top of it. Yeah, this is going to be relaxing.

I can't stand the sight anymore so I just watch Billy. He's doing some nervous fluttering thing. He's just walking around the room touching things, adjusting the volume on the stereo twice, looking out the window repeatedly, and putting the drinks on coasters. It's making me dizzy but it's also entertaining and holds my attention for a few minutes. It takes me a moment to realize why he's stopped; and when I do I can't control my first reaction.

I jump up off the couch, incidentally causing the 'happy couple' to fall apart from each other *and* knocking into the table so hard I spill my beer all over the place. I've managed to keep enough control that I don't open my mouth. Lij is so closed off and private; at least he was with me. He's big on public displays of affection when it's all goofing around but not when it's personal. I just didn't prepare myself. Fuck. I should have.

Billy's edging out of the room and Dom's deserted Elijah and is following him quickly. Great boyfriend you've got there. I can only imagine what they must be thinking right now. I really didn't want to ruin things. I wanted it all to just work out in the end. Fuck. I just can't do anything right. It's all just too much to deal with.

I'm going to apologize to Elijah and get my ass out of here. Go home to the wife who is waiting for me to wake up and take some responsibility for my feelings towards this boy. She's not blind and she's never been stupid. We've had conversations about this recently but it was already too late. He's with Dom and it's better for him - easier for me.

She didn't exactly tell me to run off with him but we both know where we stand on the extra-marital relationship front. No flings, only serious relationships, and no one of the opposite sex. This qualifies but that was all before kids entered the picture. When I started all this I didn't think she'd feel the same about it now.

"Sean." God, if his voice were any more unsure, he'd be crying. I must have really scared him with my reaction. I need to fix this and get on with my life. I was the one that wanted him to find someone new and he has. He needs to think I'm happy for him.

"I know you probably won't believe me but I'm happy for you," I say, trying to be as convincing as possible. He starts to speak but I hold up my hand and continue. "I was just surprised, that's all. I've never known you to be that open with other people around. It's okay. Dom's a good guy." I swallow past the lump trying to block me from speaking. "I'm sure he'll be good to you and if he's not, you just come talk to me. I'll take care of him for you. Okay?" I get it all out while looking at his collar and don't raise my eyes to look at him until I've finished.

He looks like I've punched him in the stomach. Great. What the hell did I fuck up now?

"Fuck you, Sean!" Huh? Why is he yelling at me? "I can't believe you!" Oh, I get it. Here I mess up his plans to get it on with his boyfriend, right in front of Bill and me.

I'm yelling in his face before he has a chance to say any more. "Yeah, well, sorry to mess up your plans for the evening. I'm sure if I leave now, you'll manage to get him back. I'm not staying but, you know, I don't know what Bill's up to. Hell, give Ian and Viggo a call. Maybe they'll bring cameras!"

I realize that I'm standing with him clutched by the arms. I'm shocked when he starts that incessant giggling again. It wouldn't be so bad, hell I'd probably think it was cute if he wasn't apparently laughing at me.

"What? What the fuck is so funny?"

I start looking around to see if he's got a stash of empties lying around to explain his recent behavior. I'm not seeing much beyond my own spilled drink and a couple of half-empties littering the table. I loosen my grip when my hands start to cramp, and before I know what's happening, I've got two arms full of Elijah.

"I love you, you stupid git," he says before jumping up and wrapping his legs around my waist. I automatically reach under and support him. When I look up, I see a huge smile lighting up his whole face.

"I love you too, Lij." I can't help but mirror it back, though I'm still confused. Not ten minutes ago he was getting it on with Dominic.

He shakes his head and his smile gets wider. "I...*love*...you."

He leans close and kisses me. It's over way too soon but before he leaves, he licks my lips and I nearly drop him. I'm not exactly sure of what's going on but at this point but I'm not fighting it anymore. I've done too much of that lately and if he's decided to go this route who am *I* to turn him away.

I slide him down so his ass is level with my quickly hardening groin before lowering us both to the couch. His moan, when I lay fully on top of him, draws me to his mouth. I need. I just need.

The first kiss is hard and sloppy. We don't meet exactly on center and I end up smooching more of his chin than anything. We shift around awkwardly for a few moments before I stretch my legs to outside his slim hips. We both groan at the closer contact. I pull back and stare down at him. He's all hot and sweaty; a wet dream come true.

I groan again before attacking his lips with a vengeance. He tastes good and feels good and I'm going to come in my pants from all the build-up. Shit. I lean away and his hands scrabble at my shirt, trying to pull me back.

"Shh. Clothes." Yeah, so I'm not articulate right now either. I sit up and pluck at his shirt until it's off, no easy feat when he's laying on it. He pushes and pulls until I get the hint and put my weight on my knees, leaving him room to undo both of our pants. I stand up and we both take off the rest of our clothes.

He gets up and takes my hand, leading me to his bedroom.


	2. Elijah

God. This has been the best. Sean is the closest friend I've ever had. We have so much in common yet there are so many new and different things we learn about each other every day.

I've never felt physically comfortable with people. When hugging, kissing, and doing other things, I've always slipped in to some role or other. With Sean, I feel free to be myself. We can let it all hang out without fear of freaking the other out.

At first I was a little intimidated. I mean he had his first role the year I was born. He treated me with affection and respect from the first moment we met and managed to get behind any walls I usually use to protect myself I before had the chance to build them up.

I'd learned as much about him as I could, including watching every movie I could rent, as soon as I heard he had the role. He told me later that he'd done the same. I was so scared that he'd be pretentious or something. Sam and Frodo are supposed to have this amazing chemistry and if we couldn't make it work I was afraid the whole thing would be a flop.

I snuggle down closer to the soft stomach under my shoulder and sigh happily. My mother was always there for me in every new adventure we'd take on. This one however was a whole new scary world. I'm so glad to have him here with me; I can't imagine my life without him.

I dozed off for a while after the movie started and woke to find it dark. I can tell he's still awake by the beating under my hand and his breathing. We've fallen asleep together before and woken up cramped and uncomfortable. It would be easier if we just got up and slept in my bed but I don't think he's comfortable with that. I know he's married. I know she's coming here and he'll need to be with her again. I just don't want to think about it.

I can see the moonlight through my eyelids and I feel his gaze on my face. I know he likes to look at me, it's no big secret. Billy and Dom used to give us funny looks but I think they just assume we're together. Sometimes I feel the others' stares but no one asks about it.

I'm thinking about earlier today when PJ gave us a blatantly disapproving look. I was sitting on Sean's knee and we were just talking quietly. He had one hand on my back and the other on my knee. It was very comfortable and sweet feeling until our eyes caught. I hadn't realized how close our faces were until we nearly kissed. We stared at each other for a moment before someone bumped the chair on their way past. That's when I looked up to notice Peter. I choose not to think about that part.

The rest of the memory brings an irrepressible smile to my face. I feel Sean shift a bit before his hand comes up and a finger slides down my cheek and runs across my lower lip. It tickles a little but I don't want him to know I'm awake just yet. He does it again and I can't help but run my tongue out to soothe the itch. When I catch his finger too his breath hitches and I start to get hard.

I know he's not quite as comfortable with that as I am so I move my leg a bit to cover myself. After a moment he kisses the top of my head and wraps himself more firmly around me giving a squeeze. The elation that surrounds me in that moment is enough to make me feel drugged. I lean up and barely avoid planting a very non-chaste kiss on his mouth, choosing instead to just smile and hug him back.

It's enough, for now. 

~*~*~*

I'm pissed off right now. It's been eleven days since the most perfect day of my life. We fell asleep on the couch again that night and woke up stiff and sore. Again. I wasn't all that uncomfortable but I could tell by the way he moved that Sean was. After a shoulder rub he took a hot shower and a handful of Advil before leaving. I didn't see or hear from him for the rest of that day which, even though it was a non-work day, was unusual.

He hasn't disappeared altogether. We still hang out and, of course we work together. There's just this distance that I don't get. I mean, I know his family will be moving out here soon. I knew that he'd want more time with them. Most of the time it just feels like he doesn't want to be near me. I finally gave up and asked Dom if he knew anything. I figured maybe someone had said something to Sean. I can't think of what else it might be.

Dom asked Billy but neither of them knew. After the drunken cry I did on their shoulders a couple of nights ago they've both sworn to help me figure it out. They now know what has and hasn't gone on between Sean and I. They know how scared I am that things will change when Christine gets here. I didn't know it would get this bad *before* she did.

So, we're sitting at a booth in the local pub. Sean was next to me but felt farther away than I thought possible. I feel like I can't do anything right in his eyes. Getting drunk is probably not the way to go, but at least I can feel numb for a while. Plus it makes Dom that much more entertaining. I can't seem to stop giggling, which is good. I wasn't sure I *could* laugh anymore.

Dom keeps leaning in real close and I can feel him talking as much as hear it. I know he's trying to see if it'll make Sean jealous. I've told them both that I don't think it'll work like that but they don't listen to me. Not the way he did. Man! I really wish I'd stop sighing. That's it; I'll just keep laughing. Maybe no one will notice that the tears are from depression rather than the outrageous jokes.

Dom freezes for a second and the atmosphere around our little table changes to pure tension. He's looking over my shoulder. I turn in time to see Sean moving quickly towards the bathroom. My brain is too sluggish to process what happened but the confusion on my face is enough to prompt the other two.

"Didn't think it'd work, eh little boy?" Smirks are not very becoming on Dom. Well okay, they are but not when I'm trying to get the sludge I used to call a brain to work.

"Huh?" Well. That was articulate. Billy pats me on the shoulder on his way out of the booth. "Huh?" Dom starts giggling. Yeah, so I'm pretty much under the table right now. One more drink and they'll be carrying me out of here.

It's only a couple of minutes later that they come out of the bathroom. Sean doesn't say much beyond goodbye. I can feel Dom shooting daggers at him from beside me and I'm feeling quite confused. He touches my shoulder gently on his way out and within a minute of him walking out the door I start bawling like the drunken baby I am. 

~*~*~*

Christine and Alexandra got here a couple of months ago and Sean has been acting even stranger than ever. He keeps citing family issues as the excuse for this tension he carries everywhere. He hasn't come out with us since that night a few months ago and looks like he hasn't slept since then either. I'm really worried.

Billy cornered him before he could leave the set today while Dom and I watched from around the corner. I could see him resisting before Billy turned on the big eye and enigmatic charm. Sean finally agreed with an ineffective glare and a smile.

Dom and I hang out almost as much as Sean and I used to. It's not the same but he helps. It's funny because Dom is the most physically affectionate, the most liberal in beliefs, of all of us. He's also the only one that claims to have never had 'that' kind of feeling for another guy. Billy's 'been there, done that' as he says. I'm glad I've had them to talk to about this. I think I'd be too intimidated to go to Ian. I *know* he would have some advice, though probably not what I'd like to hear.

So, the guys have this plan. They kept insisting that Sean was downright jealous the last time we went out. It's all a bit foggy for me but something hasn't been right with him since then so I'm willing to go along with anything if they think it'll help.

It goes like this: Dom's going to be my doting boyfriend. It's funny, as an inside joke anyway. Billy traps Sean on the inside of the booth so he has to face me the entire night. I'm sticking to water tonight. I want to be able to focus.

"Hey, guys. What's going on?" Sean asks.

"Not much." Dom puts his arm across my shoulders and it takes me a moment to get comfortable with him being that close before I snuggle in.

Sean's not buying the too-casual seating plan but settles back and grabs his beer with a look at my cup.

I can't help but watch all of his reactions the entire night. He seems okay but I'm starting to think that Dom may be right. The only thing Sean keeps glaring at is the arm around my shoulders. It feels kind of good to be cuddled but there's just something off about the feel of the body against my side.

I try to let go of all the sadness and let myself enjoy my friends and it seems to be working for all of us. Dom's become the entertainer for the night, keeping us all distracted. His arm doesn't leave me and if I didn't know better, I'd think he was coming on to me. Sean doesn't tear his eyes very far away. Every time he gives me that deep speculating look I can feel my face heat up. I want to lunge across the table and pin him to the back of the booth with my mouth on his.

By the end of the night, I'm feeling pretty good. We'll get through whatever's going on with him. Maybe if we can get him to go out with us more he'll start opening up. Maybe he'll come back to me, even if it won't be the way that I want him. I'll take what I can get, even if he has to go back to his wife at the end of the night.

~*~*~*

Time's running short for whatever plans Dom's tried to get moving. We're going to be wrapping things up in a few months and though our real life homes aren't that far apart, I know if we don't settle things here in New Zealand we never will. Just the thought of it makes me sad.

Billy's been chatting excitedly with Dom behind my back for a few weeks. I know whatever they're doing is big but for some reason I can't know about it. It has something to do with some big conversation Billy's been having with Christine but they won't tell me what was said. That's fine. I'm getting a little tired of the 'make Sean jealous' game. It always seems to backfire.

So, tonight the boys have planned the party for my house. Makes things easier on me; I can get as smashed as I want and no one can complain. Well, they can, but I can just not listen. Kind of like they do when I tell them this matchmaking thing just won't work. He's a married man, dammit! I love them but sometimes I wonder if they were dropped on their heads as babies.

Sean is sitting at the end of the couch, looking around almost like he doesn't recognize the place. Billy is playing host by getting drinks, watching for the delivery guy, keeping the music light; things I should be doing. Dom, however, is really playing it up tonight. I'm almost ready to just kiss the guy. I really hope he doesn't realize how much he's been teasing me lately. I mean, shit! I haven't gotten laid in way too long and he's constantly climbing all over me. I wonder if Sean ever thought that when I used to be allowed to hang on him all the time.

Hmm. I wonder if Dom can read my mind or if I'm just broadcasting this. His eyes are a bit heated and he's holding me so close. God, this feels good. If I closed my eyes I could almost imagine it was Sean holding me like this but that's not fair. I keep them open as his head tilts just a bit closer. I hear this roaring in my ears just before his lips touch mine. It's quick and sweet and over way too fast. I wrap my arm around his neck and pull him back to me for a bit more. Just a little bit.

The second kiss lasts only seconds longer than the first but that's because the whole couch just shook, quickly followed by what sounds like a painful thud against the coffee table. Then there's silence. I forgot for just a moment that we weren't alone. I just wanted to feel good again so badly that I guess I blocked everything else out.

Dom carefully sets me aside before running like the chicken-ass he is, dragging Billy with him. I hope this wasn't their 'big plan'. It doesn't seem to be doing much more than making everyone uncomfortable with each other, aside from the fact that I'm going to kill Dominic for messing with me like that.

I take my time straightening my shirt and turning around so I'm sitting straight. After a deep breath I manage to look at Sean. I'm not sure what I expected but to see him look so unsure is a shock. He's always sure of himself.

I can see the other two from where I'm sitting. The delivery guy picked a great time to show up; they were on their way out and they're taking the food with them. Whatever. It's not like I'd be able to keep anything down right now anyway. I've apparently done the one thing I was trying my best not to do-I Just managed to put more distance between my best friend and me than there ever has been before. Hurrah.

"Sean." Great. Way to sound like a wimp. He sits down without looking at me but turns to face me after a moment.

"I know you probably won't believe me but I'm happy for you," he says; then holds up his hand when I take a breath. "I was just surprised, that's all. I've never known you to be that open with other people around. It's okay." Oh, man. He's got it wrong. This is not the way I want it to be with us. "Dom's a good guy." He swallows hard and I start shaking. I can't believe... "I'm sure he'll be good to you and if he's not, you just come talk to me. I'll take care of him for you. Okay?"

I can't believe he's going all 'big brother' on me. "Fuck you, Sean!" Well, that worked. He's gone from looking all sincere and sick to his stomach to confused and then pissed. "I can't believe you!"

"Yeah, well, sorry to mess up your plans for the evening." What? "I'm sure if I leave now, you'll manage to get him back." Oh. Ouch! "I'm not staying but, you know, I don't know what Billy's up to. Hell, give Ian and Viggo a call. Maybe they'll bring cameras!" I can't help giggling at the last bit. He's squeezing my arms hard enough that I may be bruised tomorrow, but the image he just put in my head is hysterical.

"What? What the fuck is so funny?" he asks. I feel him looking around and behind me on the floor.

He starts to release me and I immediately throw my arms around him. I feel like the butt of a joke right now. Like we've both been talking a different language that sounded the same only meant something different. Jeez, Billy was right. Those beautiful hazel eyes are looking just a bit green at the moment. I couldn't be happier.

"I love you, you stupid git." I don't give him a chance to process anything. I just use my hold around his neck to jump up and wrap my legs around him. He does what any man with children would; he catches and holds me.

"I love you too, Lij." He smiles back up at me, though he looks a little dazed.

"I...*love*...you." I say slowly, shaking my head. I lean down to kiss him lightly on the lips. Before I pull back entirely, I give him a little swipe with my tongue just to be sure he gets my meaning.

I knew there was a smart man in there somewhere. He rubs his hard-on against my ass for a moment before we drop to the couch with him on top of me. It's the most amazing feeling, to have the person you want most in the world pinning your body with his. I can't help but moan.

His eyes go hot just before he kisses me. He hits more of my chin than my mouth but after moving around a bit, our dicks make contact and it's better than I dreamed. He's wrapped around me and I put my feet against the cushion to push up against him. Friction is my friend.

He's kissing me on the mouth now, all hot and fuck! If this is it, all I can have, then I'll take it. Every last second of it. No. He's pulling away. He can't!

"Shh. Clothes." Oh. Clothes. Naked. Skin. Yeah, now.

He practically rips my shirt off me while I push him off and undo both our pants. I'd be grinding against him again but just the thought of the zipper teeth scares me. We get up and take off the rest. I'm finished first and just watch him. God. We're really doing this. I didn't think it would happen but I'm not wondering why right now. I can't think about his wife and the home and family that he'll go back to in a few hours. I want to be selfish for a while.

I take him by the hand and without a moment of hesitation I lead him back to my bedroom.

**Author's Note:**

> You can find me at [Dark Side of Fixtion](http://darksideoffixtion.tumblr.com/).


End file.
